No fun run

I ran this shiz yesterday, post work.

If you follow me on instagram, @robine182 i should change that to blog status

you saw i was not only having a long difficult day but i did NOT want to run.

SUCK IT UP BUTTER CUP!

And i did.

I had a new outfit and everything and it was about 34 degrees out.

Before and After. and a kitty photo bomb to boot.

Jacket: Gap. Pantlopes: Oldnavy compressions LOVE. Hat/headband/earwarmers: Nike & Champion. Shoes: Adidas. FLIPBELT lovex2

So I am still doing a C25K sort of thing my trainers gave me to work on. The good news is i am still getting quicker and i have no pain. double win. I havent progressed in about 3 weeks because i havent been consistent.

First two intervals were fine.

Its freaking cold so my breathing was rough and my chest was tight.

Man that last interval i wanted to quit.

I need a route that takes me in a loop not having to back track to get my time in.

I REALLY wanted to quit.

But honestly, I was like, "if i quit now, i can't say i did it tomorrow on the blog"..

I DID IT! AND IT SUCKED BUT I FREAKING DID IT.

there it is. I struggle. its hard sometimes. but this my blog so im gonna brag away.

small miracles - archer

pic

darker days

sister megan on the left. me far right.

Darker Days Ahead.
Understatement of the year.
Some moments i am totally fine. Others, i'm a hot mess.

I had chest pain yesterday i was freaking out so much about all this family drama. sometimes i hate family and their crap. then i remember they are family. I wish i had not agreed to return for the service and reception. Its turning into an effing wedding with all the shiznat my mother is planning. I am struggling with people (family members) not respecting each other's grief, or just being straight up rude. I am especially protective if someone mean or insulting to my spouse who has done nothing other than try to help. That includes encouraging me to drink, and tearing me away from my mother when i wanted to choke her. So he has his hands full. He is not a 'member' of the family, so stop being a jerk off to him. Thats how it goes with my huge drama filled family.

Oh well. Some days are harder than others.
honestly im just ready for it to be over.
I have seriously considered going on anti anxiety meds this last 2 weeks.
i might actually need it.
I really need a run. Free therapy, man.

so why can't i just get out there and hit the pavement? its snowing lightly, its not like i havent run in worse.

funky town. i guess thats where i am.

Upside read this 'song' my sister's boyfriend, SCHVEN (is what we will call him on here) txted her.

i like him already.

so what button so what!

DUUUUUDE!

I cannot make this button work, at work.

Lame.

Maybe i should do real work instead of blogging...nah!

annnnnnnnnd away we go! Today I am saying SO WHAT IF...

• I have 218 unread blogs on bloglovin. I can't bear to "mark read" on any of them.
• give me another day or two and ill prolly mark them. sorry. i gotta life to live.
• breaking benjamin is rocking out with me. woah angry music.
• there will be 33 hours of Christmas music on my ipod for our trip back home for the funeral in two weeks.
• ive been dying to watch Elf. It makes me happy.
• i want to watch Hubby Jack's & Sally's Vlog but its like a half hour long! I keep watching it in like 30 sec bits.
• i must have this by/for Christmas.  

• new running sneakers would be great, said the girl who will be out of town for 4 consecutive weekends. #moneystight
• i missing running real bad, but havent sucked it up and made time for it lately
• i promised id start eating better today, then a friend txted me to do lunch at BWWW. Ranch Wrap is where its at.
• everyone loves all things pumpkin. and this sign made me laugh and stop on brakes in the car on our trip. nowhere...no where.. just me...uh, ok then.

• i have parents that love me, but that i also mostly want to throat punch.
• i am terrible child, even as an adult.
• Pour me another sparkling cider and carmel vodka. mmmmmmkay!!!
• I'd rather be at EVERY basketball game this year than anywhere else.

cliff

• Cliff Alexander better committ to this HOUSE OF PAIGN! - its champaign, illinois. get it?
• Did i mention i cannot wait for the game this week?

And thats what i am saying so what to this week! Peace out chicas!

And I'm Back

You may have seen for one night a ranting post.

I can get pretty worked up and angry and decided i didnt want that out here.

Any Whoo!!!!

Who wants to hear about the 1,957 miles i logged in 13 days! :)

View Larger Map

Also i know it doesnt say as many miles but we drove around a bit.

Vacation recap?

Alright. Here is a brief run down.

Snap shot i took into the sun that was BRUTAL on my drive back on Sunday.

Friday Night: arrived at 2am. My Papa passed away at 5 am. See more of that in this post.

Saturday- Monday was lots of family in and out, trying to make plans and service arrangements. Unfortunately, its not for another two weeks, so we will be driving the 1,400 miles home again in two weeks.

Dad had lots for T-Dubs and i to do. He is slowing down these days and isnt recovering quickly from his hernia operation. We moved tons of stuff to the third floor.

Dad did make some time to go shoot some guns.

If you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything.

I am into guns.

If you dont like it, dont read my blog. end rant.

Finally, we escaped (mother and i dont always get along, ever). Friday (week later) was lunch wedding rehearsal followed with day drinking, beer runs, night drinking.

Blogger fail; no pictures.

Saturday: HUNG OVER! I am no longer young, my body CANNOT handle crappy bar food, or boozing all day.

Me, Bride - Jenna, Groom - Nick, T-Dubs - goshwerehot. justsaying

Wedding prep and Wedding time. Cried my eyes out, they wrote their own vows, the officiant did a great job, it was just so beautiful.

It was slightly chilly for an outdoor wedding.

But still amazing and beautiful.

AWWWWEEEEE!

Ok, so open bar but i was still gurgle-ly. Gross.

Venue shut down at 10, shuttle provided back to the hotel, where the partiers just kept partying.

Thankfully we got a ride with some sober friends.

I laid down in my PJs for about 45 mins.

T-Dubs really just wanted to hang with the Groom, you know, weddings, everyone is everywhere all the time.

So i put on real clothes, hoddie and jeans, and my favorite sneakers.

This totally refreshed me! Gosh i was ready to drink then!

It was nice actually to just sit and chill with a few people as the bar cleared out.

Then the Best Man was nice enough to share the cigars with those of us left. Hmmmm it was really good cigars.

I like factory wrapped cigars. Sorryimnotsorry. I hate getting chunks in my mouth.

All around wonderful, the Groom made a little speech thanking everyone and i love them and miss them already! HAPPY WEDDINGMARRIAGE TO THE DOMINOS!!

Drove 13.5 hours home from NJ on Sunday. Crossed 3 entire states widths wise.

Darth loves good breakfast

Horray for normal home, and normal breakfast with my 5 am gym time.

It was long over due, i didnt even have time to take a picture of my food.

And for all my PUMPKIN SPICE CRAZIES!

Pumpkin Spice is No Where

Thanks, Loves! and for all the prayers and kind words. They mean so very much to me.